attempt 2 at making a blog... not an embedded rss feed this time! i'll be coding it all by hand, i hope its worth it... i'm not fully sure what to talk about on here since i'm a bit depressed and my life is pretty boring, i might talk about small things i think are fun and cool

i started playing stardew valley approx. 1 month ago and i don't think i've quit ever since. i got it on my ipad during a vacation in london and i somehow thought i'd get bored of it, i was so wrong! i eventually got it on my laptop, transferred my main save file to there and now i just have a shit ton of mods lmao.

it's really cool how you can build your own farm and marry hot people. i think this game is really nice because i can make up for how lonely i am irl, but also be a cool farmer girlboss, it's truly a fantasy. i rate this 20 stardrops out of 10!!!!

(By the way, I married Sebastian. Now you can rest easy.)

oooh sclptures lore

when i thought it was time for a rebrand, i wanted something that related to my interests but was also fairly subtle. arctic monkeys was the only thing on my mind back then, so of course i made it something related to that. over time i realised how much i liked the name "sclptures" because not only is it related to a very wonderful song, but it was effective at being subtle, not in your face. if i were to name myself "sclpturesofanythinggoes" then everyone's gonna know what im referencing.

i'm sorry if this entry came off as me sucking my own dick, but i just thought it would be fun to share some (pretty vague) lore.

this song won't leave me alone, i don't remember the first time i listened to it but it was so long ago and im still so SO obsessed with it. i think a part of me likes it because i relate to it, here's the summary from the genius page:

This song shows Alex Turner struggling with his public persona. In the years since his main band, Arctic Monkeys, catapulted him to fame he has gone from a shy soft spoken young man to a rock icon-by the admission of his friends noticeably more comfortable in his own skin. On this track Alex seems to be confessing that even he is unsure who the real Alex is anymore.

now, of course i'm not ALEX TURNER, but i get the idea of forgetting your true self. i've always been so insecure that i felt the need to cover it up somehow, so i've put on a persona that i think is "cool" and "hip". i'm comfortable in it, but it makes me feel so... empty?? i mean this in the least parasocial way possible, but alex's relatability makes me like him even more.

it makes me wonder if it's worth it to sacrifice your sense of self at the expense of having others see you a certain way, but again, people change and evolve, so in a few years time i might just discover who i truly am.